Ed Remmell writes: section 4.5, p. 18:
Binding Update List
"Entries from the list are deleted as the Lifetime sent in the Binding Update expires."

Not exactly correct. The lifetime sent in the BU is not the same as
the granted lifetime. The granted lifetime determines when the binding
expires.

The same statement is made in section 11.1:
"The Binding Update List records information for each Binding Update
   sent by this mobile node, for which the Lifetime sent in that Binding
   Update has not yet expired."

The following (also in section 11.1) is worded correctly, because it uses the word "initialized":
"   o  A lifetime value, indicating the remaining lifetime for this
      Binding Cache entry.  The lifetime value is initialized from the
      Lifetime field in the Binding Update that created or last modified
      this Binding Cache entry.  Once the lifetime of this entry
      expires, the entry MUST be deleted from the Binding Cache."


I suggest the following rewording for the above two occurrences in sections 4.5 and 11.1:
old text:
"the Lifetime sent in the/that Binding Update"
replace with new text:
"the Lifetime sent in the/that Binding Update (or the granted lifetime, whichever is shorter)"


section 4.6 minor typo:
"and
   ambiguity of site-local addresses can cause problems the home and
   visited networks use the same addresses."

This is missing the word "if":
"and
   ambiguity of site-local addresses can cause problems if ..."

Section 5.2, minor typo:

"However, attacker in such a location are"
"attacker" should be "attackers".

Also, some bad grammar in the same section:

"The integrity and authenticity of the Binding Updates messages to
   correspondent nodes are protected by using a keyed-hash algorithm."

Section 6.1.1, Checksum field description (remve extra occurrence of the word "procedures"):

"Note that the procedures procedures of..."
 
Minor wording issue in section 6.1.3:
"This protection is
   indicated by the IPsec policy data base."
 
reword to:
"This protection is indicated by the IPsec security policy database."

Another typo, at the end of section 6.2.7:
 
" instead the home
   address form the Home Address destination option should be used."
 
"form" should be "from"
 
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Jari Arkko writes: Thanks. These will be addressed in draft 21.  For
the lifetime issue, I used an even simpler text "for which the
lifetime of the binding not yet expired."

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